Short Takes on a Strange Place--Part 3

The Stink Bomb

The daily ritual,
the routine as it were.
Walk the 15 minutes passed
the same houses, the same trees
the same sounds of early morning.
Pretty much always the same,
with no deviation, no variables,
nothing extra to throw into the mix.
But today, oh yes, today you were there,
throwing the ultimate monkey wrench
into the mundane routine. You were
the stink bomb.

I got on the subway, like always, the E express
train heading downtown. I was shocked
to see that the car I got into was oddly
empty. But I soon found out why. You were there,
hunched over, grey, ragged clothing, bearded face, resembling
some kind of ancient miner or old prospector from the
early 1900s. I couldn't even believe that you were here on
this train in these modern times. You seemed so anachronistic
against the backdrop of modern advertisements and iPods.
But the way you looked was superflous, for the horrid wreak
coming off of you was intolerable. I noticed it right away, like walking
right through a piss waterfall. My god, it was foul.
You sat, not noticing the grimacing faces around you, the
people covering their noses and cowering on either end of
the packed car. I was one of them, and believe me, you were
the foulest smelling thing I had ever encountered.

I chuckled to myself when the train reached another stop, prepared
to take in a whole load of people standing on the platform. Upon entering
most of them took one look at you and exited immediately, some just
sucked it up and walked onboard with eyes watering, and no doubt
noses burning. You continued to sit there, hunched and wreaking
havoc by not even really moving. It was so strange how
I started to get used to the smell, but then all too soon another
wave of rotten stench came forth and all hope was lost. I noticed
one of your pant legs was tied up at the ankle, I could only assume
that you shat yerself and the excrement was settling comfortably
down there on your leg. I couldn't stare anymore, I couldn't breathe
anymore. But there was something fascinating by the way you took
over the train, it was as if you were a "stink terrorist".

Who would have thought that one person
could command so much attention by just smelling badly?

Perhaps you've cleaned yourself now, I really hope you have. I hope never to
encounter your overwhelming horrid odor ever again.
I end with one question, however; how the hell did you manage to get on that train?